Please Remember
by Lantawen
Summary: Up in Heaven Sirius remembers his relationship with Remus. songfic SLASH


Time, sometimes the time just slips away  
  
And your left with yesterday  
  
Left with the memories  
  
I, I'll always think of you and smile  
  
And be happy for the time  
  
I had you with me  
  
Though we go our separate ways  
  
I won't forget so don't forget  
  
The memories we made  
  
The dark haired, blue eyed man sat there. Surrounded by clouds, deep in thought. He smiled sadly as a lone tear made its way down his cheek, rolled off his chin and fell towards the ground far below. His magnificent white wings fluttered in the light breeze. His long locks gently swaying from side to side. Birds flew all around him, clouds floated by, and another dark haired man approached. Only this man had shorter hair that seemed to be going every which way and round glasses that covered his chocolate brown eyes. The blue eyed man didn't notice any of this though. He was lost in his thoughts, deep in his memories. Remembering a time when he had his love, his life, Remus Lupin beside him.  
  
Please remember, please remember  
  
I was there for you  
  
And you were there for me  
  
Please remember, our time together  
  
The time was yours and mine  
  
And we were wild and free  
  
Please remember, please remember me  
  
The four of us all tried to cover ourselves with James' invisibility cloak but it was no use. We might've been able to pull it off if we were in first or second year again, but seeing as how we were all in our sixth year the task was pretty much impossible.  
  
"It's useless!" cried the squeaky voice of the sandy haired boy Peter Petigrew. "We'll never be able to fit all of us in there."  
  
"Well then what are we going to do?" asked the boy with the untidy raven colored hair and circular glasses that covered his brown eyes. My best friend, James Potter. "We have to get to their common room to pull this off and I for one don't fancy getting caught in the corridors after hours by Filch and his nasty cat!"  
  
"Why don't just two of us go?" said the calm voice of the ever-prudent Remus Lupin, my secret boyfriend since the beginning of fifth year. "That way we are still able to be hide under the cloak and we'll have enough people to pull off the prank."  
  
I turned to him and gave him the cheekiest grin I could muster. "My dear Remus, the all-knowing-god-that-knows-everything, that was such a good solution to our little...dilemma that I think you deserve a prize!" I took a few steps towards him, grabbed the back of his head, pulled him to me, and gave him the sloppiest, frowziest, stickiest kiss on the cheek. Only a slobbery dog could've topped that one.  
  
Goodbye, there's just no sadder word to say  
  
And it's sad to walk away  
  
With just the memories  
  
Who's to know what might have been  
  
We'll leave behind a life and time  
  
We'll never know again  
  
That night in the Department of Mysteries, when I was dueling my cousin Bellatrix all I could think of was Harry and him. I was repeating over and over in my head, 'I hope I live through this so I can spend the rest of my life with him, and be a good godfather to Harry.'  
  
After we caught Wormtail I had planned to marry him. Not a big wedding. Just a couple of friends. Harry, the Weasleys, Dumbledore, Hagrid, and a few others.  
  
I would've bought a house somewhere out in the country away from everyone. Not anything big and fancy just a small cozy home. It would have to have a porch with a couple of rocking chairs and maybe a hammock. Right in front of the porch would be a garden where Remus could grow anything his heart desired. We could've been so happy together.  
  
Harry could have came to live with us. We could've been a nice family. The last two remaining Marauders, pranksters of Hogwarts, and the son of our fellow Marauder and a beautiful lady, living together under one roof. A terribly destructive trio we would have become.  
  
None of that can ever be. That future was taken from us. My own cousin took that future from us. That night in the Department of Mysteries, Belatrix Lestrange killed me, and when I fell through the veil I was not alone for the heart of my lover Remus, died as well.  
  
And how we laugh and how we smile  
  
And how this world was yours and mine  
  
And how no dream was out of reach  
  
I stood by you, you stood by me  
  
We took each day and made it shine  
  
We wrote our names across the sky  
  
We ride so fast, we ride so free  
  
And I had you and you had me  
  
I remember the first birthday party I threw for Remus after I escaped from Azkaban.  
  
As everyone was passing plates and helping themselves to birthday cake, Remus and I had become lost in a deep, passionate kiss.  
  
As someone began playing the Weird Sisters CD, Remus pulled away from me and whispered, "Sirius, I need you. Now."  
  
I smiled at him as we stood and clasped each other's hands. I had been about to protest, thinking that everyone would be angry with us for leaving the party, but the look in His eyes chased the words from my lips. I found that I needed him, now, too.  
  
We walked in a daze back to his bedroom upstairs. I led Remus down the hall and inside.  
  
We paused by the bed and fell into another kiss. Remus had his arms wrapped around my neck, but I was running my hands over his body, almost shyly. They had not touched each other this way in over a decade. For me, it was almost like the first time again, my need and reverence was so great.  
  
I slowly unclasped the hinge on his robe, hands trembling slightly, and let it fall to the ground by the bed. He broke away from my lips only to lift his sweater over his head. Languidly, I pulled his button down oxford from the waistband of his trousers, and began to undo the buttons. I slid the shirt off, my hands gliding over his shoulders and down his back as I did so. Remus had undone my robes, and we broke briefly again to remove my sweater. Once we had my shirt removed, we pressed ourselves together and kissed for what seemed like an eternity.  
  
I ran my hands over his torso and back as if I would never be able to do so again. I made sure that my hands did not miss an inch of the beautiful, exposed white flesh. Soft sounds of pleasure escaped both of our throats.  
  
I lay Remus gently on the bed and undid his trousers. As I removed them, I once ran my hands the full length of his legs and feet, lingering on his firm, smooth thighs. When I had finished undressing Remus, I stood and hastily undressed myself under the weight of my lover's hungry stare.  
  
I stood for a moment and drank in the sight before me. Remus was lying on his back in the center of the bed, arms lifted above his head. I reached out and traced his collarbones, ribs and hipbones with my fingertips. Remus shuddered and closed his eyes, mouth falling open just the slightest bit. His stomach rose and fell with the quickness of his breaths.  
  
It suddenly became imperative that I kiss every inch of his body. God, I am pathetic, I thought to myself, I can barely control myself. Remus was so beautiful lying there, my heart felt as if it would burst. I climbed onto the bed at the werewolf's feet. I picked up one foot and kissed the top of it, and smiled as Remus giggled. His feet are still ticklish, I thought idly. I moved up to his ankle, and the giggling was replaced by a sharp intake of breath. I lingered for a moment, running my tongue in circles around the bone, then dragging it up his shin to his knee. Remus shivered as I nibbled the sensitive flesh just above his kneecap, then moaned as I worked my way up his inner thigh. Teasingly, I moved right to his hipbone, alternately biting and licking. Remus was moaning my name over and over and running his fingers through my long black hair. I moved left, barely touching my lips to his stomach, which was very sensitive, causing Remus to arch up in an attempt to increase the pressure, but I only moved away, causing him to whine. I smiled again, and continued up to his chest. I spent significant time on his nipples, biting, kissing and blowing on them until they stood erect and were flushed almost red. I very lightly nibbled his collarbones until the sandy haired man was tossing his head back and forth with abandon.  
  
I nuzzled into his neck, just inhaling his scent, before relentlessly sucking on the muscles that were straining there. At long last, I pressed myself on top of Remus and kissed him hungrily, tour bodies moving together in a slow, steady rhythm.  
  
"I missed you," Remus whispered into my ear. I had no words for Remus; I just pulled him into another kiss in response.  
  
We stayed this way for a long time, just enjoying the sensation of skin on skin, lips on lips, tongue wrapped around tongue. I finally pulled away, and began making my way down the other side of his body. When I reached his hips this time, however, I stopped to stroke his erection with my fingertips, and flick my tongue over the tip. Remus cried out loudly, sank his fingers into my hair, and threw his head back. I watched his face through half closed eyes as I swallowed the werewolf whole.  
  
Remus had never looked so exquisite in his whole life. I was touching him as if he would evaporate and disappear were I to stop. Each touch from me sent small shocks coursing through his body. He gripped the sheets so tightly that he pushed his fingers through in some places, looking as if he were straining not to come as I took him in my mouth.  
  
I worked Remus to the very brink before pulling away. Remus whimpered loudly and threw his head to the side, panting hard. I just watched him for a moment, before making my way back down to his other foot. When I was done, I reached for my wand. Long ago Remus had shown me a nice little spell that provided a wonderful, vanilla flavored lubricant.  
  
I stood on my knees, straddling his waist. Remus was lying with his eyes closed, moaning softly. He jerked as my thighs touched his sides.  
  
"Remus, open your eyes and look at me," I whispered.  
  
Remus did. He inhaled sharply. I was looming over him, stroking myself. I placed my other hand on his stomach for support and looked deeply into his eyes.  
  
I gently spread the werewolf's thighs and lowered myself between them. After making sure that he was ready, I sank slowly into him. Remus cried out again, and left a trail of fingernail marks down my back.  
  
I could tell that the gentleness of my slow thrusts was exquisite and maddening to him. If someone had ventured in and asked Remus his name, he probably could not have told them. He was wholly lost in the perfection of the moment, only aware that he and I were one.  
  
I rolled over on my back and pulled Remus on top of me. Holding his hips I gently guided him up and down.  
  
I pulled out and moved from underneath him. Remus whimpered, probably wondering if I was trying to torture him. "I love you Remus. Don't worry, we're not done by a long shot." I turned on my side and pulled his back to press against my front. Wrapping my arms tightly around his chest, I entered him again.  
  
I thought my mind would break from the pleasure, as it wasn't a pleasure that was wholly physical. I felt connected to Remus in a way that I never had before. If Remus had gotten up and left at that moment, I was sure that I would have died. But Remus did not leave, only continued to let me love him, until I was almost ready to burst.  
  
Again, I pulled away. I kissed his shoulders and back, then pushed him down onto the bed facing me and slowly pulled his face towards mine I pushed into him once again as our lips met.  
  
When I was almost there and clearly not going to stop, Remus gently moved away from me. I groaned in protest, but stopped when Remus rolled onto his back and pulled me on top of him, pushing my hips down so that Remus inside of me this time. His pace increased and his fingertips sank into my hips. "Oh God, Sirius, I'm going to die, I think. I'm coming, oh Sirius," he panted.  
  
He took my face in his hands, clearly having been waiting for this moment. "Do you know I love you, Sirius?"  
  
I forced my eyes open and looked into his. They were bottomless pools of amber with flecks of gold, and the expression in them was of infinite love.  
  
"Yes, Remus, I know, oh, oh God," I said as I exploded onto Remus, collapsing on the werewolf what seemed like an eternity later. I was surprised to feel tears coursing down my cheeks.  
  
We laid in silence for a very long time, running our hands lovingly over each other's bodies. Finally, Remus spoke. "Sirius, I don't know what you just did to me, but I want you to know that I will never be able to leave you. I can't believe that I thought for so long you were a murderer and you betrayed our best friends I don't think I could leave you. You're stuck with me." He nuzzled into my chest.  
  
I smiled and stroked his hair. "I love you and I'd never do any of those things, I hope you get that now. I couldn't live without you."  
  
Remus looked up at me. "I love you, too, Sirius. And I will never question you again. Unless I need you to prove it to me again," he added with a wicked smirk.  
  
Please remember  
  
Other tears joined the first. One for each memory I had of Remus. When I sensed someone behind me I slowly turned and came face to face with my best friend. He held his arms out; I took his silent offer for a hug and cried on his shoulders for what seemed like hours.  
  
He gently ran his fingers through my hair. "I can't take... it anymore James... I need him... love him...so much." I gasped in-between sobs. I could feel one hand slowly rub circles on my back.  
  
"Don't worry Sirius." he whispered. "I miss him too but one day we will all be together again and we will never have to be separated again."  
  
Slowly my crying stopped. James took my hand and pulled me to where Lilly was waiting for us.  
  
James is right, I thought, we will be together again...one day. 


End file.
